THAT TIME OF YEAR

The office was finally going public with details of this year’s holiday party. Every year, we shut down the office for one day, and come together that night to celebrate the end of the year - and each other. Thanks to Daisy, the office sourpuss and HR person, we can’t really say Christmas, so we focus on the whole end of the year thing. As a result, Dave (the office drunk) no longer dresses up like Santa. We all knew he was inappropriately groping most of the women, but in the spirit of Christmas, Daisy should have forgiven him too. Ron from procurement mentioned they had some sort of fling in the copy room. When the evidence showed up accidentally in the annual report, it proved true. I stopped using that copy machine.

Another change was the Secret Santa Gift exchange. Once we gave up Santa, it was just a Secret Gift Exchange. And when Daisy was the only woman in the office to get a feminine hygiene basket, she was not a happy camper. Out went the gift exchange all together. I miss it, I always got cool things. Last year I got a new iPod. I’ve since learned not to wear them when fighting evil – as they tend to get damaged. And it’s hard to explain to the folks at the Genius Bar that I was saving the city when half my pod got incinerated.

The only thing that’s pretty much going to stay the same this year is the entertainment. For the last five years, Rona, Sasha, Sherrie and Tanya get together and sing a few songs. Did I mention those are the hottest ladies in the office? Last year, there was something with Fishnet stockings and spiked heels and those laced-front bustiers. Oh how I love my job.